What do you do, just for fun? Do you DO anything for fun? What do you think about fun? Is it just a “nice-to-have” or something you can experience only when you’re a kid or retired?
I just finished “Pieces and Bits” from “Codependent No More.” This is the chapter full of “miscellaneous tidbits about codependency and self-care.” Guess what she recommends for self-care?
Evidently it’s rather hard to have fun when we’re full of unprocessed emotions, super tense from trying to control our selves or others, and super self-conscious because we care SO MUCH what other people are thinking about us.
But Having Fun is key component of self-care! It can be the catalyst for getting us out of pain. Having fun helps us stay healthy. Having fun provides balance in our lives, and in doing so can help us be more productive. And we need to have fun because it’s FUN!
But what if we no longer know how to have fun?
- What was fun for you when you were a kid?
- Racing your bike against your brothers? Watching Pee Wee’s Big Adventure in your PJs with your cousins? Staying up until 2AM finishing Lord of the Rings?
- What gives you a little spark of excitement or nervousness when you think about doing it?
- Taking an art class? Striking up a conversation with a person you see on your morning walk every day? Joining a pickleball league?
- What makes you jealous when you see someone else doing it?
- Hula hooping in front of a crowd? Wearing something that’s just a bit risqué? Hiking the Grand Canyon?
All those are clues as to what you might find fun. Sometimes you just need to TRY some things out and see what you think. See how you feel. When I first rode my Surly Ogre (a sturdy bike with big, fat tires), I was immediately transported back to being a 12-year-old and the feeling I got riding my blue Schwinn Predator into town with my dad and my brothers, intent on getting to Kardee’s ASAP so I could slice the taste buds off my tongue with a Jolly Rancher stick. Those trips into town on my bike were SO much fun, and every time I hop on my Ogre, I feel joy. I still love to ride my road bike too, but my Surly is FUN!!!!
Speaking of fun, jumping on a trampoline, laughing with friends, jogging in nature – these are all things that can be fun. But if you experience stress incontinence, these are all things you may avoid. Sorry for the awkward segue, but I know many of my clients and myself are in the perimenopausal/menopausal/post-menopausal stage where a little pee with sneezing or a lot of urgency with peeing becomes a real issue. I just listened to this podcast about the topic today and learned about some therapies that can make a HUGE difference to women. Of course they mention the benefits of pelvic floor physical therapy, but they also talk about things like mesh slings and Botox! It was a helpful episode from two well-credentialed women (The host is a menopause doctor, and she is interviewing a urologist), and they frankly discuss things often pushed under the rug (like the harm that acidic urine can do to sensitive vaginal skin). This episode AGAIN reminded me of the need to do weight training (grip strength is correlated to pelvic floor strength!). It’s so good for what ails ya, especially in these transition years.
I hope you have a fabulous Sunday; respond to this email and let me know what you did or ARE doing that is fun. I am always looking for good ideas .
Space to be Human Lab
- I’m heading out for Cranial Sacral training tomorrow! I am super excited about bringing this nuanced work into my practice.
If you would like to sign up to get these posts sent to you directly, please click here.